Iowa Caucus? More like Cry-owa Mock-us! Ladies, am I right?

First, let's get the real shocker out of the way: Mitt Romney won the Iowa Caucus. I know. I could hardly believe it myself. No, the real surprise of the event was that he only won by 8 BLEEDIN' VOTES! And guess who his runner up was? Yep, you guessed it! Former Pennsylvania Senator and current Google phenomenon Rick Santorum. Oy vey. Rick Santorum, the man whose campaign was not just considered a long shot, but actually something of a joke, lost the Iowa Caucus by merely 8 votes. This tells us something about the the Republican party, and those who vote for them. This shows just how little they want to elect Romney. Caucuses are supposed to give us something of an idea as to who is strongest in the polls. They're supposed to give clear pictures as to who voters are excited about. Clearly, they are not excited by Romney. Let's be real for a second: He was very nearly beaten by a man whose only political attribute is that he's a raging homophobe. Republicans aren't acting like they want to wholeheartedly back Romney; they are acting like they're stuck with him. Which they are. Some of them have already accepted this fate. Don Lutz, an Iowan who considers himself a "Newt guy", says he will vote for Romney simply because he doesn't want his vote to be wasted. That is not the voter attitude a campaign is looking for. I suggest Romney change his campaign slogan from "Believe In America" to "You're Stuck With Me Whether You Like It Or Not". Dickstein, out.