Expect The Unexpected

The New Hampshire primaries are officially over, and it's safe to say that everyone was taken aback by an outcome that nobody saw coming. In the first primary of the season, the state's famously independent voters shocked the world when they voted Mitt Romney in as the winner with 39.3% of the vote. Ron Paul finished a not so close second, with 22.9%, and Jon Huntsman came in third with 16.9%. The event was a huge failure for Huntsman, who bypassed Iowa to focus more on New Hampshire. He had hoped he could appeal to the independents with his, well, let's be honest, logical ideas. But, unfortunately, no matter where he goes, Huntsman will never be able to shake his official title as "the other Mormon guy". Most people just see him as mini-Mitt, which is a shame, because Huntsman is actually the much more viable candidate. But that's neither here nor there. Continuing with the results, Rick Perry's meteoric fall from grace was exemplified perfectly here, with the former GOP frontrunner garnering only (i kid you not) .9% of the vote. Speaking of frontrunners, how did Newt Gingrich do? The man who even had the cojones to declare himself the frontrunner must have done pretty damn well, no? No is right. The Fig Newton finished fourth, just a few votes ahead of Rick Santorum, with 9.4%. Now it would seem that Gingrich's rise to fame and glory is over, just like every other GOP candidate who surged ahead of Romney at one point. The real shocker of the night came when it was found out that Michele Bachmann, the absolute joke from Minnesota who withdrew from the race a good amount of time before the primary, actually won .1% of the vote. That's right. 349 people voted for someone who wasn't even on the ballot. Hoo-boy. That aint good for the Republicans. But, hey, this is just the first of many primaries. While it is ridiculous to think that Mitt Romney will lose, expect to see a bit of a mini-surge from Gingrich, who is popular among Southerners. Also expect Huntsman to get absolutely ripped apart by the South. It's not an issue of "if" at this point, just an issue of "when". Dickstein, out.